The "Root Cause" of Kim Jong Un's Disaffection: He Wanted to Look Like Jean-Claude Van Damme (Instead of Being Damn Ugly)

Poor lad. If only he'd gotten more hugs when he was but a sprout:

Kim Jong Un may be fond of fiery anti-Western rhetoric, but in fact the North Korean dictator is obsessed with the European and American lifestyle, according to a man who has known him since he was a little boy.

Kenji Fujimoto, who served as the personal sushi chef of Kim's father Kim Jong Il for 13 years, has revealed that the 30-year-old despot is a fan of the Beatles and longs to look like Hollywood star Jean-Claude Van Damme.

Kim also drinks Bordeaux wine, smokes Cartier menthol cigarettes and has enjoyed driving around his palace in a Mercedes since he was just seven years old.

Some unhappy young'uns terrorize people in a city with improvised explosive devices made out of ordinary pressure cookers; others terrorize the world with much larger explosives.