Please, Sir, I Don't Want Any More

Funny blogger iowahawk imagines Barack Obama, Nutritionist-in-Chief, writing a weekly newsletter informing schoolkids of their lunch options (or lack thereof):

MONDAY

Low fat Sweet & Sour chicken, steamed vegetables, whole grain rice, caffeine-free unsweetened tea

Did you guess Monday’s delicious & healthy mystery cuisine? That’s right! It’s Chinese, just like my good friend President Hu Jintao. Who? Hu, that’s who! He dropped by my house for dinner recently, where we talked about our many challenging debt problems – and how generations of American kids like you will be helping solve them. Remember to bring $5 for authentic chopsticks!

TUESDAY

Hummus, falafel, tabouli, yogurt ayran

On Tuesday we say “open sesame” to the delicious healthy cuisine of our peace-loving friends in the Middle East. That exciting region has been in the news a lot recently, especially Egypt. This week we learned that ancient land is much more than just pyramids and mummies – it’s also a place where people get disappointed when they lose their internet connection. While you are enjoying lunch, talk with your friends about Egyptian current events. Who are the ‘good guys’? Who are the ‘bad guys’? What should I do? When you have an answer, write an essay and send it to me. You might win an all- expense-paid diplomacy trip with my State Department team!..

Can you say yum-o?