Saturday, March 17, 2012

Side By Side By Burman

Toronto Star columnist Tony Burman (late of the Ceeb and al Jazeera) invites readers to see the other side of a simmering conflict:
A besieged country surrounded by hostile forces committed to its demise, with outsiders actively fomenting internal revolt and chaos.
That is Israel I am referring to, right? No, wrong. From the perspective of Tehran, I am referring to Iran. After all, this story does have more than one side.
Right you are, Tony. There's the Jewish side, which insists on its right to exist and defend itself, and the Ayatollah's side, which on more than one occasion has proclaimed its intention to wipe the Jews off the map. That Tony sides with that side over the Jewish one tells you about all you need to know about him. But in case you're still unclear about his stance vis-a-vis Israel, I've taken the liberty of revising an old Joni Mitchell number:

Nukes and kooks and fanatics
Who like to fool us with their tricks.
Dreams and schemes of total dicks
Who want the Jews to die.
But Tony thinks it's relative.
Who cares if Jews just want to live?
It can be solved with take and give.
He thinks it's worth a try.
He's looked at things from both sides? No!
He's quite one-sided and he'll show
It's Ayatollah's side he's on.
He's really such a huge
Mo-or-on.

Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter.

1 comment:

Carlos Perera said...

Not to worry: Should the worst come to pass and the major urban centers of Israel become smoking radioactive ruins, Mr. Burman and his ilk shall shed enough crocodile tears for the dead, dying, and displaced to put out the residual fires. Though I doubt that even under those circumstances they shall go so far as to blame _Iran_ for the holocaust; no doubt, the blame shall be shifted to the West's "hostility" to the ayatollahs' regime . . . and especially to Bush and Cheney (who might just wind up being charged with war crimes for the destruction of Israel under this scenario).