Wednesday, November 2, 2011

A Swiftian Modest Proposal

If you want to see what are alleged to be topless pix of Country cutie Taylor Swift on a nutty website called Celeb Jihad, fugedaboutit: a glut of traffic from those wanting to catch a glimpse of the naughty shots has crashed the site. Either that or it was shut down on purpose by the server when it tried to induce Swift to submit (in more ways than one). According to this report, the site promised
"We will remove the [photo] if Taylor Swift simply agrees to convert to Islam. To convert to Islam, Taylor Swift must publicly renounce her Jew God Jesus then sacrifice a goat and devour its entrails. Pretty standard stuff really."
For sure--but surely they jest, no?
"We are 100% serious about removing the picture if Taylor Swift agrees to convert to Islam," the site's spokesperson reeled, adding that they may seek their own justice under religious Sharia Law. "We have yet to hear back."
What's more, as reported by MSN, the website is supposedly run by a suicide bomber survivor and an ex goat herder, who say there will be "serious repercussions" for Swift if she and her lawyers follow through with their lawsuit.
The bloggers also claim that despite paying money for "internet filters" they have received an "influx of traffic from perverted Taylor Swift fans…(which) has interrupted service for dedicated Jihadists." They're now demanding that all Swift fans leave their site.
You know you're living in zany times when you can't tell the real jihadis from the satirical ones.

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