Tuesday, August 28, 2012

If, as the NYT Claims, a Climate Trial Could Echo the Scopes Monkey Case, Does That Make Mark Steyn the William Jennings Bryan Figure?

And "hockey-stick" climate scientist Michael Mann the Clarence Darrow?

Steyn cheekily suggests that it might have the makings of "Climate-gate: The Musical," so I thought I'd take a stab at writing its showstopper. You may recall it from Gypsy! (one of Mark's Broadway favourites, I believe):

Have a big stick, Mr. Mann, sir,
Have a tactic, have a mission, give a graph.
Have a closed mind, Mr. Mann, sir,
Any mindset like Al Gore's mindset's
Good for a laugh.

Have a hope, have a plan,
Have the dope, do a scan,
Throw your hands up--you're da Mann!
Have a fit, have a rave,
Do you think Mark Steyn will cave?
No, sir--he'll sing with elan!

Kind of grouchy, Mr. Mann, sir?
Tell us any little thing that we can do.
Who'll go "ouchy," Mr. Mann, sir,
With a lawsuit or two?
Everybody say, "By gosh,
Mr. Mann, sir, it won't wash.
Mr. Mann, sir, think it through"...

There are drumsticks and chopsticks
And fish sticks and mop sticks
And Popsicle sticks for a start.
There are sticks for your lollies,
Pick-up-sticks for jollies,
But Mann's hockey stick's
Nor for the faint of heart...