Anthony's Weiner Drives Globe and Mail Opiner Tabatha Southey Into a Penis Paroxysm

Hard to believe (no pun intended) that this type of drivel is what passes for incisive commentary at Canada's newspaper of record:

...Maybe there’s a map to buried treasure on Mr. Weiner’s penis, or the key to deciphering Linear A. Maybe Mr. Weiner has the Rosetta Stone of penises and he’ll just have to keep showing it to people until someone recognizes its significance because, people, this is history. 

“For pity’s sake, read my penis!” poor Mr. Weiner cries out to an all-too-easily titillated Internet, one that continually misses the point and just yells, “Penis!” 

“My wife doesn’t understand my penis,” he goes on. “It’s in Greek. For the love of God, check it out. I’m fairly sure the second book of Aristotle’s Poetics is on there.” 

Yes, this is what I choose to believe.

Maybe Tabatha Southey is a penis brain.