Go To "L"

In response to a Fanny Brice op-ed piece in the Toronto Star, someone with the same last name as the Egyptian tyrant who suffered an ignominious loss to Israel in the Six Day War writes a letter to the editor in which he high fives Pride organizers. (Oddly enough, there's no link to his letter online.) "Those of us who want freedom and human rights for Palestinians," he fumes,

are ourselves the ones decrying the hateful prejudice--in this case a ruthless theocracy that relegates non-Jews to a status for which basic human rights and dignity cannot be afforded. Pride organizers should be proud of their refusal to be thrown over by the Zionist lobby.

And there it is: the "L" word. The one that such "human rights" champions like to toss around with--you should pardon the expression--gay abandon; the one they don't realize is like one of those airport security scanners and reveals all the nasty naughty bits lurking beneath the sheep's clothing. My letter:

I would like to ask Mark Nasser, who commends Pride organizers for “their refusal to be thrown around by the Zionist lobby” why it is that that’s the only kind of “lobby” we ever hear about? What is that we never hear about, say, the Tamil “lobby” or the Sikh “lobby” or the Islamic “lobby,” even though each of those groups have what amounts to such a body that lobbies on behalf of its interests? I would suggest that the reason only those who support Israel are accused of gathering together in a “lobby” is a throwback to historical accusations about Jews coming together for nefarious purposes--a modern day “Elders of Zion”, if you will.

I might suggest it--but then I’d only be accused of being a lobby member myself.

And here's my poem for Nasser's namesake:

I belong to the Zionist lobby;
In fact, you could say it's my hobby.
We are ever so caring;
Eat smoked meat and herring;
And endeavour to never be snobby.