Saturday, April 23, 2011

It's Murray Python's Flying Kangaroo Circus

The Guy Earle case turns up in Brit paper The Daily Mail:
Nobody is laughing now.
Canada's British Columbia Human Rights Tribunal has ordered amateur comedian Guy Earle and restaurant owner Salam Ishmail to pay $22,500 in damages to a woman who claims she suffered lewd lesbian insults during an open mic night. 
The woman, Lorna Pardy, 32, told the court she was mistreated by Mr Earle, who served as emcee at Zesty’s Restaurant on Commercial Drive in Vancouver on May 22, 2007.
The court ordered Mr. Earle to pay Ms. Pardy CA  $15,000 (US$15,745) for lost wages and for injury to dignity, feelings and self respect. Mr. Ishamail was ordered to pay her $7,5000.  
Ms. Pardy, who works as an airport weather technician, said she has been diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder...
Hey, me too. Who do I sue for my post-traumatic stress, incurred every time one of these wacky but freedom-demolishing "human rights" decisions is handed down? (She worked as an airport weather technician, eh? Sounds like a highly stressful job to me. Maybe that--and not Earle's insults re her sexuality--is behind her PTSD.)

Here's my sob story about an insult that cut me to the quick: When I met my husband back in the late 1980s, he was driving a Plymouth Volare. I married him anyway, and he kept the car for another few years. One day, a couple driving a Mercedes cut us off and, when my husband expressed dismay over the anti-social driving, they made snide, snippy and downright nasty comments about our car, which "hurt my feelings," and "injured my dignity and self respect" (even more than having to ride in a Volare did, I mean).

Could I complain to a "human rights" body about these meanies, these hegemonic car snobs? Could I haul them in front of a "human rights" court and maybe get a nice pay day at the end of it for my "pain and suffering"?

Of course not.

That's because unlike, say, Lesbians, Volare owners are not on the short list of designated victim groups.

Where's the fairness, I ask you? If you prick Volare owners, do they not bleed? If you diss them, do they not suffer from post-traumatic stress?

Volare owners have feelings, too, you know.

Update: Sing it, Dean, and ease my worried mind.

I don't know why those meanies dissed our car--and caused such heartache.  Didn't they know it had "rich Corinthian leather"?


Carlos Perera said...

Hey, ain't nothing wrong with a Plymouth Volare! They were great cars. In fact, the whole Dodge/Plymouth (a distinction without a difference by the 1960s) line was great.

My first car was a 1965 Dodge Dart that I inherited from my dad, my second was a 1973 Dodge Dart Swinger that I actually bought brand new, then kept for over 20 years. That's the car I used to court my now wife of 33 years. I always thought the Swinger was a big plus in my favor . . . but now I feel insecure about it. Has my wife held me in contempt all of these years because I was driving a Swinger when we met? Now _I_ feel emotional stress. Maybe I have PTSD from your post! I think I need to talk to a Toronto-area attorney! (Nothing personal.)

scaramouche said...

Sorry for your trauma, Carlos. Please don't turn me in to the thought cops. ;)